Contrary to common sense and experience, the best way to get people to open up and begin talking is not by asking a question, but rather by making a request. While questions are the natural “go-to” for getting others to speak their minds, it is actually requests that pose as questions that get the job done most expertly.
Agree – very effective. Learned these/this technique as part of my leadership coaching program through American University several years ago, and it’s really paid off, both in professional as well as personal settings.
This reminds me of Brené Brown's vulnerability encouragement phrases, "Go on" or "Say more," but with more specificity. It's giving me many ideas for using within my 1:1s. Thanks for sharing!
It also helps alleviate the pressure my ego puts on me to be generating the smartest question in the room... what we really want is to get people to talk. So simple!
Agree – very effective. Learned these/this technique as part of my leadership coaching program through American University several years ago, and it’s really paid off, both in professional as well as personal settings.
This reminds me of Brené Brown's vulnerability encouragement phrases, "Go on" or "Say more," but with more specificity. It's giving me many ideas for using within my 1:1s. Thanks for sharing!
It also helps alleviate the pressure my ego puts on me to be generating the smartest question in the room... what we really want is to get people to talk. So simple!
Agree - same for me! It's incredible how these simple, subtle shifts make an outsized impact on our ability to lead. Human psychology is fascinating.